Shot Gun Wedding of One
by FailedAuthor
Summary: I'll go out like a shot gun wedding. One clean shot to the head, straight through, and out the other side. WARNINGS! Character suicide, language, and all around depressed-ness. YAOI! One-shot, one sided Figgy.


Do you know what's worth fighting for?  
>When it's not worth dying for?<br>Does it take your breath away  
>And you feel yourself suffocating?<p>

I loved you. I always will. But I'm not enough for you. You want so much more; a family, a wife, kids. A white picket fence, a normal happily ever after. Things I could never, ever give you. Every time I'm around you, I'm drowning in emotions. Love, hurt, happiness, sadness, butterflies in my stomach and the urge to bawl my eyes out. I want to brush it off, like it doesn't matter. I want to be happy for you and Max. But my selfish desire isn't letting me, and my love for the flock, all the years spent out of a dog crate with all of you, won't let me hate both of you either.

_I wish I could tell you that I'm sorry, and actually mean it. But I've always hated lying to you guys. _

Does the pain weigh out the pride?  
>And you look for a place to hide?<br>Did someone break your heart inside?  
>You're in ruins<p>

It hurts, so much. Enough for me to give into the pain, let it control me. In my moment of weakness, I outstretched my hand towards you, Fang, but you turned me away because of the way I felt. I wanted to run away and hide, but running didn't make me feel any better. My hearts in your hands Fang, you've always held it. It's been safe all these years, until the day I crumbled, and you crushed it.

_I was weak. I let the pain rule me, and even now, as I write this letter to you, I'm weak. I'm crying. I'm sorry Angel, for making you hide this. But I knew that Max, or Gazzy, or Nudge, maybe even you, Fang, would try to stop me, and I didn't want that to happen. _

One, 21 guns  
>Lay down your arms, give up the fight<br>One, 21 guns  
>Throw up your arms into the sky, you and I<p>

The barrel of the hand gun is cold against my temple, and my shoulders hunch forward. Tears are leaking from my eyes, even in my last moments I'm weak. I've always been the weakest. I act like my lack of sight doesn't bother me, but the truth is, every time we move, I tumble further into a black abyss, I take one more step in the wrong direction. _Click_. The safety comes off, and now I hold in my hands a deadly weapon, and I hold my heart again. But I can't find the will to listen to it anymore, to stop this and go back to the flock.

_I don't want to go through this anymore. My hearts in pieces, and my chest has gone numb. Everyday is torture, and I have to drag myself out of whatever I'm calling a bed that night every morning. Every time I wake up I wish I hadn't. I'm a mistake, don't you see? I'm blind, and I just screw everything up. I'm a waste of space. _

When you're at the end of the road  
>And you lost all sense of control<br>And your thoughts have taken their toll  
>When your mind breaks the spirit of your soul<p>

I let the tears out, and press the barrel harder to my temple. My hands shaking, as I reach my index finger out for the trigger. I'm so close, so fucking close…Every word you said to me that day is spinning around in my head, bringing a fresh round of sobs.

_I had pulled you into our room, and closed the door. I stuttered my way through it, and you just flat out told me, you said that you loved Max. You said you were sorry, and walked out. Each time your foot hit the wood, my heart broke a little more. I hope you see now how you effect me, I hope you meant it when you said sorry. _

Your faith walks on broken glass  
>And the hangover doesn't pass<br>Nothing's ever built to last  
>You're in ruins<p>

It didn't even affect you either. You just kept on moving through life, the same as always. But not me. I was a mess, I just never let it show too much. Rejection hit me like a hundred Flyboys to the face.

_Please, don't cry over me. I'm not worth it. I don't deserve your tears, if I can't even put up with a simple rejection. Just forget me. _

One, 21 guns  
>Lay down your arms, give up the fight<br>One, 21 guns  
>Throw up your arms into the sky, you and I <p>

I cried, and shoved the shotgun to my head. This was it. I'd go out like a shot gun wedding, one bullet, clean through, and out the other side.

_Well, I guess this is good bye. _

Did you try to live on your own  
>When you burned down the house and home?<br>Did you stand too close to the fire  
>Like a liar looking for forgiveness from a stone? <p>

A deep breathe in, and one out.

_I'd like to say its been nice knowing ya, but as I said before, I don't like to lie. _

When it's time to live and let die  
>And you can't get another try<br>Something inside this heart has died  
>You're in ruins<p>

I pulled the trigger, and that was that. One clean shot, straight through, and out the other side.

Good bye, Fang.

One, 21 guns  
>Lay down your arms, give up the fight<br>One, 21 guns  
>Throw up your arms into the sky, you and I <p>

_**A/N: I apologize for this pile of depression. By the way, I know that's not what a shotgun wedding is. The way Iggy interpretated it was that the bride and the groom both shot them selves and that was the wedding. **_

_**Anyway, reviews are love, and flames will be used to roast weenies :)**_

**I guess I should probably mention this… **

**If I owned Maximum Ride or Green Day…(insert something funny and yaoi-full). But clearly since that hasn't happened, I do not. :D**


End file.
